My Family-of-Choice recently suffered a great loss – one of our Brothers crossed over the Bifrost Bridge very unexpectedly, while his partner was out of town. He was a pillar of our community, and had been a vital part of Us for well-nigh 30 years (long before I came around!).
In conversation with another Bro this afternoon, we came around to “How are you dealing with this?”, and I was able to articulate, for the first time really, how I actually perceive Death ~
I’ve “lost” many people who were very important to me, over the years – parents, other relatives, friends and lovers – and my responses have varied, depending on both the circumstances and my maturity (of course!)
Where I’m at now, I look at Death as the ~ONE INEVITABLE THING~ in every Life: the Reapers (Guides, Valkyries, Angels, whatever name you like) will come for each of us, sooner or later, one way or another,
- no matter what we do in the meantime!
I believe in an everlasting Soul, which may (or may not) manifest again on the Earth in a human body.
Meanwhile, the Soul is in another Cosmic Zone, doing things that we, here, have a hard time even imagining: Learning, growing, choosing, teaching, maybe even flitting around and playing harp in the clouds…
I believe that the pain we feel when someone else dies is mostly for ourselves and our loss ~ and that’s Okay. A Funeral is a collective sharing-of-pain, and an opportunity also to share our memories of joy.
Inevitably, Death’s timing really sucks. It seems to “take far too long”, show up “much too soon”, or be “so sudden”. Or all of the above.
^^^ This was originally written (and shelved) on May 25, 2009. Since then, we have lost 3 more Brothers from this Plane ~ 2 after long and painful illnesses, and yet another both ‘too young’ and ‘without warning’. We are reeling, both individually and collectively. We will, each and all, move past this intense and immediate pain, to a place of a ‘dull ache with occasional twinges’. We will each use our own methods, and make our own progress.
And we will <strike> suffer through </strike> have many more losses to deal with, until it is our turn, each of us, to BE the loss whom others mourn.
Meanwhile, I will live my life with JOY ~ and celebrate those who have gone ahead ~